Randomness
by ff-kh-luvrgrl
Summary: Just some random crack fic I came up with. There will be more chapters Yaoi, insanity, and, oh, yeah, ooc!
1. Chapter 1

me: SQUIRRELS!!!!

Peter: O.o

okaaay...

me: ((giggles))

here is a randomly funny lil' fic i thought up. Enjoy!

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

Axel ran into the room, screaming that he had found the meaning of life.

"What is it?" asked Roxas.

"42!"

WHAM

Demyx and Zexion looked up from their make-out session to see Axel's body hanging from the ceiling, his head no longer visible.

Meanwhile, Xigbar was trying to teach Saix how to aim, with Xemnas and Xaldin watching (laqughing) in the background. Saix was not doing so well.

"DAMMIT!!!!!" Saix yelled, and suddeenly he transromed into his feral state. Grabbing his smashie-thingie, ((A/N: I have no idea what it's called, and i've tried looking for it. I'm giving up. the last time i worked on this thing - up to "Grabbing his" - was 3 days ago. so DEAL WITH IT.)) he suddenly attacked Xigbar, who screamed a lot like a girl.

After beating Xigbar to a pulp, he turned to Xemnas and Xaldin, who were laughing hysterically. Xemnas moved out of the way, knowing what was about to come. Xaldin's laughter soon turned to shrieks and squeals of pain as Saix pulverized him. When he was done, Feral Saix looked at Xemnas, then looked at the door, and then looked back. Xemnas raised an eyebrow. Making his decision, Feral Saix ran out of the room, seeking his next victim.

In another part of the castle, Lexaeus and Vexen were trying to convince Marluxia to redecorate this castle.

"Absolutely not!! Don't you remember what happened when you two decided to redecorate Castle Oblivion?" Marluxia was still mad at the two for what had happened to his beautiful castle.

"Oh, so it was OUR fault that Riku and Sora ran around every room multiple times destroying everything for health balls, Moogle points, and new cards?" Vexen asked incredulously.

"I wanted to try out some new decorating ideas I got from TLC." Lexaeus pouted. Vexen and Marluxia looked at him weirdly. "What?"

Suddenly, Saix burst into the room, issuing a war cry. Marluxia dissapeared in a shower of petals, and Vexen and Lexaeus summoned their weapons. Actually, only Lexaeus summoned a weapon. Vexen (the wuss) has a _shield_ that he uses as a weapon. How lame!

Vexen turns toward the Authoress. "Shut up! It has pointy things on the top!"

'Uh-huh. _Lame_ pointy things. Wuss-man.'

Lexaeus yells at Vexen, "Would you quit arguing with the authoress? Saix is about to pulverize you!"

At this, both Saix and Vexen - I mean, Saix lowers his weapon, and Vexen lowers his lame-ass shield. "Man, that was so out of character for you!" Saix exclaims, "Aren't you supposed to be the _Silent_ Hero?" At this, Lexaeus breaks down crying.

"I can't help it!" he sobs, "It's the authoress' fault! She's making me do it!" At this, a man made of steel ((A/N: Colossus!!!)) appears out of nowhere and quickly beats up Lexaeus and Vexen, whose elements have little effect on the sexy mutant. When he's done, he looks at Saix.

"You wanna insult her, too?" Saix squeaks in fear and runs away. Suddenly, a woman dressed in black and carrying a huge sword pops in. "Damn. I wanted to get some action, too!"

One of the steel man's eyes twitches. The silver-haired female ((A/N: guess who!)) groans and rolls her eyes. "Not _that_ kind of action! I mean I wanted to beat someone up!"

'You will next chapter, 'kay?'

Roxas (who has mysteriously appeared in the middle of the room _without_ using a portal) blinks in surprise. "You mean there's _more_ insanity to come?"

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

me: -

yes, i know that was short.

Peter: I'm finally in one of your fanfictions!

me: ...

You're in _all_ of my fanfictions, you idiot!

Peter: ((pouts)) i mean in the actual _story._

Paine: ((rolls eyes)) review or she won't update.


	2. Chapter 2: lol it's back!

ff-kh-luvrgrl: WHOO-HOOOO!!!!

it's once again (FINALLY!!!) that time...

RANDOMNESS!!!!!!!!

w00t!

Disclaimer: disclaimed, my bitches!!! (jk, lol!)

note: should i be making an appearance in the next chapter?

that will depend on your feedback!

ON WITH THE FIC!!!!

OoOoOoOoOoO

**Last time**

_Suddenly, a woman dressed in black and carrying a huge sword pops in. "Damn. I wanted to get some action, too!"_

_One of the steel man's eyes twitches. The silver-haired female ((A/N: guess who!)) groans and rolls her eyes. "Not that kind of action! I mean I wanted to beat someone up!"_

_'You will next chapter, 'kay?'_

_Roxas (who has mysteriously appeared in the middle of the room _without _using a portal) blinks in surprise. "You mean there's _more_ insanity to come?"_

OoOoO

The sexy stud o' steel ((A/N: i made that nickname up!!! NO STEALING!!!!))) and the gorgeous lady with silver hair stare in shock as Roxas suddenly dissapeared as suddenly as he had appeared in the first place.

"Creepy..." the steel stud says. THe woman next to him nods slowly in agreement.

_CRASH!!!!_

"What the-" the man of steel begins, but is cut off by the intruder who just burst through the roof.

"HEY, PETER!!! HEY PAINE!!!!!" the man in black ((A/N: no it's not Jay OR Kay. Got it Memorized? Axel: HEY!!! that's my line! me: tough!!!)) exclaims, TOTALLY out of character as his red dragon, Thorn, lands on the ground in front of them.

"MURTAGH, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!?!?!?!" Peter roars at the dragon rider.

_You don't need to yell, you moron._

Everyone just blinks.

"WHO THE HELL SAID THAT?!?!?!" Murtagh screams in fear.

_Under you, brilliant._

"Eragon?!?!"

_NOT THAT KIND OF 'UNDER YOU'!!!! IT'S ME, THORN!!!! JEEZ, YOU DON'T EVEN RECOGNIZE YOUR OWN FRIGGIN' DRAGON?!?!?!_

Murtagh, Peter, and Paine all hold their heads.

"Thorn, please. You're giving us headaches..." Murtagh pleads with his angered dragon. Suddenly. a sapphire dragon bursts through the ceiling, a blonde on her back. "ERAGON!!!!!"

"MURTAGH!!!!" Before his dragon even lands, Eragon (the imbecile) jumps off, trying to jump to Murtagh but failing miserably and landing flat on his face with a thud.

"OWWIE!!!" Eragon screamed, glaring at the authoress who is now whistling innocently while typing.

'What?'

_Yo, Saphira, what's up?_ Thorn asked the beautiful blue dragon.

_Nothing really,_ Saphira replied, _but I think Eragon is a little mad with the authoress for some strange reason. I think she's nice._

The authoress sent her a deer, which she ate immediately, licking her lips.

_Hey, don't I get anything, o lovely authoress?_ Thorn asked sweetly.

'Nope.'

_WHAT?!?! WHY NOT?!_

'Because you gave me a migrane earlier what with all that mental screaming. It's not very pleasant.'

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!" Feral Saix suddenly ran in - all _six_ of him. Apparently, he walked in on what turned turned out to be one of Wuss-man's ((A/N: Vexen)) many failed expirements.

"Murtagh!!! Where did Thorn and Saphira go?!" Eragon exclaimed worriedly. Murtagh went over and picked up a large note, then read it out loud.

"Yo, Murt and Era,

Saphira and I were bored off our scaly asses, so we decided to go catch a movie. There's a new one that sounds familiar about this freak farmboy who finds a large blue stone, or something. Later, losers! Thorn."

((A/N: HOW Thorn wrote this note without assistance, I have no clue. he just did.))

"Well, that's interesting," Eragon commented.

"No Jack Sparrow immitations!" Paine ordered.

"CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow!" Eragon, Murtagh, Peter, and all six Saix-es retorted at the same time.

'you guys are sooo weird...'

One of the Saix-es stuck out his tounge at the authoress (what a f-ing moron) and was promptly squashed by Peter. The other five Saix-es started screaming and running around the room like thie idiots they are.

"YAYY!!!!" Axel and Roxas squealled, quickly taking out three of the Saix-es, who had somehow each split into two or three Saix-es each.

Suddenly, Demyx appeared (along with seven more Saix-es) and started wiping them out rather quickly, bashing them on the head with his sitar in a very un-Demyx-like way.

"HOLY HELL!!!" Axel exclaimed, "THERE'S A BAJILLION OF 'EM!!!!" Axel was talking, of course, about the continually increasing number of Saix-es. Also, he was just making an (extremely wrong) estimate of how many there were. If he had actually counted, he would have found that there was actually one million exactly.

"One MILLION?!" Roxas said, looking at the authoress increduously.

'Yup! One million! Wait - make that nine hundred ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred ninety-three. Demyx just took out seven more.'

"I thought Demyx was one of the two who _didn't_ like to fight," Eragon said, obviously confused. (which is no surprise, really; he is usually confused.) "HEY!!"

'What? _I_ didn't say anything!'

"YES, YOU DID!!!"

'Nuh-uh. Anyway, yes, Demyx _is_ one of the two in the Organization who really doesn't like fighting, the other one being his boyfriend, Zexion.'

Just then, Zexion burst into the room with a war-cry-ish yell, holding Auron's (obviously stolen) sword above his head before rushing into the sea of Saix-es.

'Okay...'

OoOoOoOoOoO

me; it just keeps getting randomer and randomer than ever!!!!


	3. Chapter 3: Here's Effie!

ff-kh-luvrgrl: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!! PRINCESSES!!!!

(note: read the Xemnas Reports on DeviantArt to get it. plus, i will probably be using jokes from them in the story, so it would help a you a lot if you read them. That, and the fact that if you even think this story is _slightly_ funny, you will _adore_ the Xemnas Reports!)

Murtagh: GIMMIE MORE SUGAR!!!!

((yes, i'm totally aware that he is WAAAAAY ooc. I happen to think it's funny, especially since i think that Murtagh kinda needs to lighten up sometimes.))

Riku: MUSH PUPPIES!!!!

((Zexy knocks him out with the flat of Auron's sword))

Auron: ((bursts in)) WHERE'S MY SWORD?!?!

Zexy: ((hides sword behind back, though it's kinda obvious that his has it, as you can still see it)) i dunno.

Auron: ((looks at Zexion suspiciously for a minute, then nods)) RIGHT!!! WELL, THEN I'D BETTER GET GOIN' TO FIND MY DAMN SWORD!!!!!! ((runs out))

Peter: ff-kh-luvrgrl doesn't own kingdom hearts or any--

me: ON WITH THE FIC!!!!!

OoOoOoOoOoO

**LAST TIME**

_"HOLY HELL!!!" Axel exclaimed, "THERE'S A BAJILLION OF 'EM!!!!" Axel was talking, of course, about the continually increasing number of Saix-es. Also, he was just making an (extremely wrong) estimate of how many there were. If he had actually counted, he would have found that there was actually one million exactly._

_"One MILLION?!" Roxas said, looking at the authoress incredulously._

_'Yup! One million! Wait - make that nine hundred ninety-nine thousand, nine hundred ninety-three. Demyx just took out seven more.'_

_"I thought Demyx was one of the two who didn't like to fight," Eragon said, obviously confused. (which is no surprise, really; he is usually confused.) "HEY!!"_

_'What? I didn't say anything!'_

_"YES, YOU DID!!!"_

_'Nuh-uh. Anyway, yes, Demyx is one of the two in the Organization who really doesn't like fighting, the other one being his boyfriend, Zexion.'_

_Just then, Zexion burst into the room with a war-cry-ish yell, holding Auron's (obviously stolen) sword above his head before rushing into the sea of Saix-es._

_'Okay...'_

**Randomness, chapter three - Here's effie!**

'You guys get all the fun...'

"YOU CALL THIS FUN?!?!" Roxas exclaimed, glaring at the ceiling.

'Yup, and I'm not in the ceiling, brilliant.'

"Grr..."

"AAAA!" Eragon screamed, ducking a claymore, only to be hit by another in the back of the head.

"Eragon! Fight already!" Murtagh yelled at him.

"Fight? Oh, yes, that's right," Eragon replied, "I'm supposed to be fighting right now, aren't I?"

"Yup!" A petite brown-haired girl a few inches over 5' said, nodding her head before joining the fray, swinging Lionheart effortlessly, cutting down more and more of the ever-increasing number of Saix-es.

"And just who the hell are YOU?!" a confused (as per usual) Eragon inquired.

"Duh! I'm effie, the authoress!"

"WHA?!!!!! SINCE WHEN ARE _YOU_ IN ANY OF YOUR FICS?!"

"Since now, dumbass!"

"Isn't that... _Leon's_ sword?" a confused Roxas asked, still fighting the seemingly unlimited number of Saix-es.

"No shit, Sherlock!"

Glaring at the _gorgeous_ authoress, Roxas was nearly beheaded by one of the Saix-es, but Axel blocked it with one of his chackram.

"YOU AREN'T GORGEOUS!!!!" Roxas yelled at the wonderful authoress, and everyone (including all of the Saix-es) collectively gasped.

Effie's eyes started to water, and Peter ran over to comfort her, nearly getting mauled in the process, never mind the fact that he was _still_ armored up. ((A/N: That means he's in his metal form))

Axel ran over and protected Roxas, whom Peter had "accidentally" knocked out when running over to effie. Demyx started singing "Cotton Eye Joe", and Zexy and Eragon soon joined in singing with him.

Suddenly, RIku burst in with two keyblades in his hands - Souleater and The Way To Dawn.

"Hey!" effie exclaimed, no longer crying, "How the heck can you have _both_ of them?! Isn't Souleater _part_ of The Way To Dawn?!"

Riku looked at effie, then down at his keyblades. Then he looked up, and then back down again, and then up, and then back down, repeating this until Axel threatened to burn him if he didn't answer immediately.

"Umm... Yup!" He said, and effie, Peter, Axel, Paine, and Murtagh all took a second to sweatdrop, while effie and Peter slapped their foreheads.

Suddenly, about fifty Xemnas-es ran in.

"Dammit!"' Roxas exclaimed, "Vexen is the only possible cause of this! It's from one of his stupid experiments!"

Suddenly, there was a BIIIIIIG poof of smoke (or whatever), and when the smoke cleared, there stood Sora, holding Oathkeeper and Oblivion.

"Hey! So _that's_ where they went!" Roxas exclaimed, then shrugged. "Ah, well, I like Sleeping Lion and Bond of Flames more, anyway..."

"Yeah, plus, what the hell would you need a Drive Form Boost for? You don't even _have_ any drives!" Sora added, and Roxas started to cry. ((A/N: hey, i'm just goin' with it. so if anything seems weird, it's just because it's just flowin' out at the moment. that, and the fact that this is _Randomness_, and everything's supposed to be somewhat screwy anyway))

_POOF!!!_

"Oooooohhhh..."

Roxas was now wearing an outfit that looked a little bit like his Twilight town outfit, except almost all black. On each sleeve, there was a yellow 'X' in a circle, and he had a belt with tons of pouches and a clasp that looked like the 'X's on his shirt. He was wearing his Organization boots, and was holding Sleeping Lion and Bond of Flames while Diamond Dust and One-Winged Angel floated beside/behind him. ((A/N: think Valor and Final mixed... and yes, i know that Diamond Dust and One-Winged Angel are from KH1... i like their names, and they look pretty cool... at least Diamond dust does... i can't quite remember _exactly_ what One-Winged Angel looks like...))

"Wow..." Roxas finally got out, then turned to the authoress, who was holding a remote, "What is this?"

"That," effie replied, "Is Ultimate-Evolution Form. Only you can use it."

"Thanks! And, uh, what's the remote for?"

"Look at all of the Saix-es and Xemnas-es. What do you notice about them?"

Looking around everyone noticed that they were all frozen in place, almost as if someone had "paused" them...

OoOoOoOoOoO

me: yup, I'm evil. CLIFFIE!!! (okay, not really, but still...)

now, i KNOW some of you like it, since i have had 4 reviews from three people. HOWEVER, if I DO NOT have 10 within two weeks of me posting this, I will remove the story from FF Net. This is NOT an empty threat.

P.S. - Whatever Women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought of as half as good. Luckily, this is not hard.


	4. And Now For Something Completely Diff

ff-kh-luvrgrl: I had the most WONDERFUL idea for a chapter name in this fic, so i decided to start writing it NOW!!!! n.n

Murtaghy: ff-kh-luvrgrl doesn't own any of the characters (besides herself) in this fic (oh, and Colossus - she owns him too; don't let the people at Marvel fool you!!) SO DON'T SUE!!!!

Peter: YAY!!!

Murtaghy: AND DON'T CALL ME MURTAGHY!!!!!

me: i would never!

Murtaghy: ((points to his previous lines))

me: why, Murtaghy, why on earth would you go back and put a 'y' at the end of your name in every line?

Murtaghy: ((eye twitch))

me: ON WITH THE FIC!!!!

OoOoOoOoOoO

Randomness

Chapter 4 - And now for something completely different...

OoOoOoO

**Last time**

_Roxas was now wearing an outfit that looked a little bit like his Twilight town outfit, except almost all black. On each sleeve, there was a yellow 'X' in a circle, and he had a belt with tons of pouches and a clasp that looked like the 'X's on his shirt. He was wearing his Organization boots, and was holding Sleeping Lion and Bond of Flames while Diamond Dust and One-Winged Angel floated beside/behind him. ((A/N: think Valor and Final mixed... and yes, i know that Diamond Dust and One-Winged Angel are from KH1... i like their names, and they look pretty cool... at least Diamond dust does... i can't quite remember exactly what One-Winged Angel looks like...))_

_"Wow..." Roxas finally got out, then turned to the authoress, who was holding a remote, "What is this?"_

_"That," effie replied, "Is Ultimate-Evolution Form. Only you can use it."_

_"Thanks! And, uh, what's the remote for?"_

_"Look at all of the Saix-es and Xemnas-es. What do you notice about them?"_

_Looking around everyone noticed that they were all frozen in place, almost as if someone had "paused" them..._

OoOoO

Everyone looked back at the authoress, who then pressed another button, causing Eric Idle to appear out of nowhere, dressed in a suit and sitting behind a desk, obviously doing one of his "news reports."

"And now for something completely different... A man with nine legs."

"He ran away!" came a disembodied voice, and one of Eric Idle's eyes twitched.

Effie pressed another button, and Eric Idle dissappeared, only to be replaced by the Knights of Camelot ((A/N: you know, the ones who eat ham and jam and spam a lot?)), who just ran around causing pandemonium and mass hysteria, as well as defeating the Black Knight.

By this time, Effie had "played" all the Saix-es and Xemnas-es, and they made somewhat quick work of the Knights of the Round Table, only suffering a few losses.

Meanwhile, Murtagh was fighting an Xemnas, who seemed to think that he was invincible, to which Murtagh replied by telling him he was a loony. This particular Xemnas had already lost both arms an his right leg to Murtagh's sword, and was currently trying to defeat Murtagh by bleeding on him.

Fed up with him, Murtagh chopped of Xemnas's remaining leg. Xemnas looked at his limbs (or lack thereof) and then looked up at Murtagh, conceding, "All right, we'll call it a draw."

Murtagh chopped his head off.

MEANWHILE, Cid had appeared out of nowhere with his Cid Cannon Mark II ((A/N: see Kingdom Hearts Manga)) and obliterated almost half of the Saix-es and Xemnas-es. Unfortunately, he was soon KO'd and dissappeared into thin air.

MEANWHILE, Demyx and Zexion were plowing their way through the sea of Saix-es and Xemnas-es. Be the time they had reached each other, they had annihialted about half of the remaining Saix-es and 14 Xemnas-es. They kissed each other, then portaled to Zexion's room where they had hot gay sex. ((A/N: yum!!!!))

"Well, dang. Those two were surprisingly good fighters," Peter stated, and Paine nodded in agreement.

"AAAAA!!" Effie screamed as she was nearly sliced as one of the Xemnas-es tried to go all Darth Vader on her. In retalliation, she pulled out Hyperion ((A/N: Seifer's gunblade. p.s. - Seifer+Squall my current fave yaoi pairing!)), which had _apparently_ been on her back, but which no one had seen until just then...

Easily weilding one gunblade in each hand, she started doing as much damage as Roxas, who had _four_ keyblades!

Sora, sobbing because the wonderful authoress gave Roxas a new form and didn't give him one (even though this was Roxas' first ever drive form), suddenly dissappeared in another cloud of smoke. Suddenly, a giggling Saix and Xemnas (obviously drunk off their asses) stumbled into the room and ran into a Saix, resulting in a massive headache for them both and All the other Saix-es and Xemnbas-es merging with them.

"well, _that _ was rather anticlimatic," Effie stated, unhappily sheathing hyperion in the sheath that had suddenly appeared on her right side ((a sheath on the right side is for a sword held in the left hand - easier access - and a sheath on the left is for a sword held in the right hand)) and Lionheart in a sheath that had mysteriously appeared on her left side. ((A/N: I'm right handed - though somewhat ambidexterous, also, but that's beside the point - so my right hand is stronger, since i use it more)) Riku's eye twitched.

"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO'S WRITING THE DAMN FIC!!!!" he yelled two inches from Effie's ear, and so she promptly punched him in the face.

"I know that, and please don't yell in my ear. I'm not deaf, and I would _so_ terribly hat to have to kill you."

Riku fainted.

Axel, finding the whole exchange hilarious and having just knocked out his Superior without the aforementioned Superior know it was Axel who knocked him out, started rolling around on the ground laughing his ass off.

"...So, what do we do now?"

OoOoOoOoOoO

me: sorry it's so short, everyone, but it's now 6:17 am (i've been up all night, typing off-and-on), and i'm pretty damn tired. (I also worked four and half hours last night. that, and i'm piss because a fic that i had saved long ago that I THOUGHT was GeorgeHermione turned out to be FREDHermione - GROSS!!!) oh, and i meant to say this last chappie - Roxas's drive form is sorta based off of some of the X-men costumes/uniforms/whatever the hell they're called, thus the name "Ultimate-Evolution"

please review! if I don't have 5 reviews for this chapter within 2 weeks, i probably won't post another chapter for a long time, and i happen to like writing this fic, cause i can be as silly as i want to be!!!

also, if i haven't gotten ANY reviews (and you don't count, akurokulvr - you're my lil sis!) within a week of me posting this, the story will be removed from Fan Fiction . Net

Laterz!


	5. Can YOU do the CanCan?

ff-kh-luvrgrl:hey! it's 3 am and i'm writing! why? because i can't sleep, i'm bored, and if i try to go to sleep now, i'll be late for work in the morning! i swear, they make us high school students work WHENEVER there's a break...

ANYWAYS, this chapter of randomness is dedicated to My Worst Nightmare Is Now Real!

HERE WE GO!!!!

Roxas: ff-kh-luvrgrl does not own the kingdom hearts franchise or the final fantasy franchise.

me: ...

...meanie...

Peter???

Roxas: now she can't be annoying/stupid and claim that she bought a copy of the game or whatev--

me: I FINALLY GOT A PS1 MEMORY CARD ON SATURDAY!!!!

Axel: O.o

RIku: o.O

me: i got ff8 on wednesday, but i couldn't save it cuz it wouldn't save on either a ps2 card or the ps3. But i'm good! i'm on the first mission, which is--

squall: NO SPOILERS, ESPECIALLY SINCE THEY AREN'T EVEN FOR THE GAME THIS FANFIC IS FOR!!!!!

Seifer: this story contains insanity, stupidity, theiving characters and authoress, and, most importantly (and most obviously), RANDOMNESS!!

squall: please enjoy!!!

me: ON WITH THE FIC!!!!

OoOoOoOoOoO

**Randomness, chapter 5**

**Can YOU Do The Can-Can?**

OoOoOoOoOoO

_Riku fainted._

_Axel, finding the whole exchange hilarious and having just knocked out his Superior without the aforementioned Superior know it was Axel who knocked him out, started rolling around on the ground laughing his ass off._

_"...So, what do we do now?"_

"ATTACK!!!!"

the group whipped around to see a mob of Lexaeus-es, Luxords, Vexens (though they were more laughable than scary, as they were cowering behind their shields), -

"WE'RE NOT COWERING!!!!!!"

"If you say so!"

- a couple of Marluxias, and one Larxene heading toward them, weapons (with the exception of the Vexens) ready to attack. The group of heroes (Riku was conscious once again) huddled together, then nodded and spread out in a line, all of their weapons put away. As the mob neared them, they linked arms.

"Almost... almost... NOW!" effie shouted as the mob reached them. Suddenly, Can-Can music began, and the group began doing the can-can, lifting up one leg with the knee bent, putting it back down, then kicking with that same leg before repeating with the other leg. The effect was devastating. All but two Lexaeuses, one marluxia, one luxord, larxene, and all of the vexens save two were annihilated. (the Vexens had refused to attack, choosing to run around screaming when they heard the music instead; the two that were annihilated were offed by Larxene who was fed up with their screaming.)

The two groups faced each other, weapons at the ready (all except for Riku, who was somehow unconscious once again...), but...

"THWEEEEEEEEEET!" ((whistle blowing))

"AAAAAAA!!" ((everyone screaming in surprise))

Peyton Manning ran in, football under his arm, the rest of the Colts soon following.

"Okay, time out!"

"WHAT THE _HELL?!?!?!"_ Murtagh shouted, only to be knocked out by a steel-plated football.

"Ooh, _that_ had to hurt..." a giggling Axel said, peering down at the now-unconscious Murtagh.

"I _said,_ time-out, people!" Peyton yelled.

"PEYTON!!!!!!" Effie ran over and jumped on him, giving him a big hug.

"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!"

"Who the hell is _he?!_" Roxas inquired.

"GASPTH!!!" Effie said, finally letting go of Peyton. "This is Peyton Manning! he's the quarterback for the Colts!"

"...He's a quarterback for horses?!"

"...No. Nevermind, okay? Just forget it."

"If you say so..."

"I just did!"

"..."

OoOoOoOoOoO

me: the chapters seem to be getting shorter and shorter... -.-'

sorry!

i'll try to update MWB soon, but there's no guarantees!

please review!

(flame, and you'll be annihilated in one of the next few chapters.)

**Next chapter: Marluxia and the dress of doom**!!! (most likely; i MAY change the name... and the subject... but whatever...)


	6. Chapter 6:Marluxia and the Dress of Doom

Title: Randomness

Chapter : 6

Chapter Title: Marluxia and the Dress of Doom

Authoress: ff-kh-luvrgrl

Date: 6-1-2007

I'M SO SORRY!!!!!! I've been busy with school and crap like that, plus I don't have the LAPTOP anymore, (HINT, lil sis, HINT!!!!) so I can't write at nighttime. But still, I'm VERY sorry I haven't updated anything yet, and I'll try to do that soon. However, if you're waiting for a fic to be updated that I use the script from its game to write it, then it probably won't be updated for a while, as I already have a few chapters (I think) done and waiting to be uploaded AND all my scripts are saved on the laptop. In a few months however, I'll hopefully have enough to buy my own laptop. I'll try to get the scripts saved on that quickly, and then I'll get to writing! (at the moment, I'm saving up for a video ipod!!!! YAY!)

Peter: ff-kh-luvrgrl does NOT own Kingdom Hearts, or any other characters portrayed here, except for herself, and that doesn't really count.

Me: ON WITH THE FIC!

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(A/N: almost forgot: this chap is dedicated to Phaz, the ONLY person who liked me enough to review chapter 5, and My Worst Nightmare Is Now Real)

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Marluxia and the dress of doom 

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"Well, it sure took THEM a long time to leave!" Effie exclaimed, watching the Colts fly away on a plane.

"Of COURSE it took a long time! You wouldn't let go of Peyton until Colossus threatened to kill Iceman!" Roxas yelled, fed up with the authoress.

ZZZAAAPPPP!!!!!!!

"…Ow," Roxas croaked, then fell over sideways after being struck by lightning… indoors.

Axel gasped loudly, then started sobbing that Roxas was dead until Roxas summoned a keyblade and hit Axel with it to get him to shut up. Murtagh, (who now has a VERY large bump on the side of his head) looked down the hall.

"HOLY HELL! THERE'S TWO CHICKS WHO LOOK LIKE THEY WANNA KILL US !!!!!!" Murtagh shrieked, scaring the hell out of everyone else. Paine was the first to respond.

"Only ONE of those two is a female. The other is some extremely efemite guy wearing a horrid puce dress with hot pink flowers all over it." She stated, then covered up a yawn. "This'll be easy."

"How so?" Effie questioned.

"Well, there are a bunch of us and only two of them."

"There aren't that many of us. Axel took Roxas to his room – he said he was going to go heal him, but he left his potions here – Murtagh just fainted, and I can't find Hyperion!"

"Weel, at least there's you, me, Paine, and Riku," Colossus stated, somewhat happy, "Right, Paine?"

"…"

"Paine?"

"Guys- had to go sort my sock drawer and polish my vinegar bottles. Don't know when I'll be back. Paine," Effie read, then looked up at Colossus and Riku. "Why does everyone leave a note and then leave?"

"Eragon didn't," Riku stated, "You shoved him into that hole when Murtagh wasn't looking."

"you be quiet!"

"…Those two are sure taking a long time to get here," Colossus said, nodding towards Marluxia and Larxene, who was wearing her Organization coat.

"Oh, REALLY??!!" came a far-away yell, and then Marluxia appeared above them, his dress lit up like a tree at Christmastime.

"AAAA!!!! BAD IMAGE!!!" the three "heroes" screamed, covering their eyes in pain.

"HOW DARE YOU INSULT ME!!!!" Marluxia screamed, "DRESS OF DOOM CHANGE TO BOMB MODE!!!!!"

"Marluxia, no!" Larxene screamed, but to no avail. Colossus tackled Effie and Riku, shielding them (he was armored up, so he'd be okay) as Maruxia's dress started beeping.

"Whoozzere?" Murtagh mumbled, xoming to just in time for Marluzia to blow up, the explosion only injuring him and Marluxia, as well as knocking Larxene out.

"OWWIEEEEE!!!" Murtagh screamed, burnt black, as he stumbled towards the wall. Unfortunately, he ran into a window and fell through.

"MURTAGH!" Effie yelled, worried because they were on the 8th floor.

"Cool! I landed in a giant milkshake!" came Murtagh's voice from outside.

"Milkshake? YUM!" effie exclaimed, running towards the window, only to be stopped by Colossus, who had reached the window a second before she did.

"That's not a milkshake! That's a giant bottle of hot sauce!" Colossus said.

"AAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! IT BURNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Came Murtagh's voice, screaming in pain.

Riku slapped his forehead. "Um, guys, we better do something before Larxene wakes up…"

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That's all for now!

I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

If you want to appear in randomness, please put it in your review and pm me your appearance or how you want to look in this fic. I'll try to put you in my fic!

Peter: REVIEW!!! BEFORE LARXENE WAKES UP!!!!!


	7. Authoress's note

Hello, all!

I'm sorry to inform you that I will not be continuing this fic. (at least, not anytime in the near future, unless I have the urge to. Which probably won't happen.)

But DO NOT PANIC! i WILL be starting a new fic, much like randomness, but a bit better-thought-out and mostly just Kingdom hearts characters. in the meantime, i will be going through my old fics and cleaning them up.

my faithful reader My Worst Nightmare Is Now Real – i'm sorry that i won't be continuing this fic. one of my reasons is so that my readers will know who the hell i am talking about, since i had so many characters from other fandoms. I will inform you when I post my new fic, all right?

Also, I'll be out of the country for about 2 1/2 weeks, so don't expect ANY updates any time soon. I will try to update my other fics as soon as possible!


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